Sunday, June 14, 2009

Sometimes

Sometimes -
you should know this
so pay attention -
sometimes when I wake up
in the morning
I look in the mirror
and I think I look beautiful.

Sometimes - 
pay attention please - 
I walk through the subway
burnt hair/shit smelly subway
and I want to love everybody
the sad, the mad, the confused, the lost
and I want to bring them all home and 
light them up like
God-candles.

Sometimes -
this is important -
I curse at people
who cut me off in traffic.
"Stupid fucking bitch!"
I yelled last month, twice
with my son in the car
laughing at me.
One woman waggled her finger at me
which was totally fucking infuriating
and hysterically funny
all in the same moment
and I confess I can't remember
if I sent her any 
Love Energy to counteract the 
Dire Energy I hurled at her
with my words and my spirit.

And sometimes - 
you listening? -
sometimes I bless the slow driver 
in front of me, surround them 
with soft white light,
wish them all the happiness
in the world whether they "deserve" it 
or not and they always, always
soon thereafter, turn off the road 
and make their way home or 
to their next appointment
unaware of what's just happened
to them.

Once -
only once, mind you -
I sent deep, dark, poisonous arrows
into the belly of another woman
a woman who made one of my 
dearest friends cry - no, I mean
made her sob and weep 
for hours. I watched this mean woman 
walk blithely by me and
before I could stop myself
before I knew what I was doing
before I knew if it would matter
I sent those sharp and deadly arrows 
deep into her belly where they lodged (I think)
and took up residence,
burrowing into the soft flesh of her womb.
I keep waiting to learn
that she has cancer.

So sometimes -
I'm sure you understand why -
sometimes I think
I might be a little bit magic
sometimes I think 
I might be a little bit witchy
sometimes I think
I might be a little bit crazy
sometimes I think
I might be a little bit nuts. 

June 14, 2009